I'll be honest: I'm trying to get your attention. I am trying to make my voice louder than the noise of whatever else you consume in these spaces, such that you can carry my words with you and apply them in your life when you need them the most. I want to get your attention because I am invested in your joy.
I want to remind you, as often as I can, that your absolute happiness is possible.
I'm not talking about the fleeting happiness that comes from things like new cars and good sex, but absolute happiness - happiness which cannot be upset or destroyed by external circumstances.
Spoiler alert: I'm not in the business of making roadmaps to happiness. I'm in the business of helping you pick a route - any route - and stick to it until a better route presents itself.
As a coach, my work is helping people overcome their bullshit. My job is to gently, but firmly, help people get out of their own way.
I am constantly investigating how to do this work for myself, such that I can speak from a place of experience. In truth, I often struggle with how to talk about the work that I do as a coach. So many of us have been trained to respond only to people who position themselves as “experts.” We want someone who has totally mastered the thing, such that we can find out exactly how they did it, and do it too. The reality is: When it comes to transforming your deep seated negative tendencies, there is no such thing as expertise.
There is constant work. The more your garden grows, the more weeds you'll have to dig up.
The more your bucket fills, the more leaks you’ll have to patch. The brighter the light, the darker the shadows. You get the point. It's the Mystic law of the Universe. Enlightenment isn't just a mental or spiritual state. It's a constant state of action. It’s a practical way of living in the world — a constant pursuit of the “best self” that cultivates your “best life.” I’m not an expert at happiness or purpose; I’m just not afraid of failing and flailing on my way there. I'm willing to show up for the experiment.
The truth is, I don't want to hold your hand through the forest.
I want to light the torch at the entryway, remind you to be brave, and make sure you're equipped with tools that will support you along your journey.
This means I have to go through the forest, too. My intention is to speak from a place of experience, not expertise. I want to be able to say, “I did it. You can, too. I’m still doing it, and you can, too.”
So I am working to get over my own bullshit. I am working on getting out of my own way. A purposeful, liberated, joyful life isn’t about beach vacations and manicures and green juice. It’s about doing the dirty work of dealing with your own negative habits, getting real about your self-sabotaging behaviors, and coming face to face with your toxic beliefs. It's about unpacking that bag of all bullshit you’ve been carrying around for years, laying it all out, and seeing what you need to throw away. It’s about being honest with yourself about the ways that you are complicit in your own suffering and then doing whatever you need to do to change.
My work is helping people get brave about doing the scary, ugly, dirty work that gets us closer to our wildest dreams and deepest desires.
I am determined to get to the end of this lifetime and and know that I changed the course of human history for the better. I want to know that I used my life as a balm on so many wounds. I want to know that I helped people build bridges from fear to freedom, and I did it by building my own bridges, first.
I am thankful to have you here for the journey. You are my motivation to keep growing. You are the reason I keep moving forward, even when I’m not sure what’s next.