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*"This is fine." from Gunshow illustrated by* *K.C. Green*

If you're going through an experience that feels like sitting in the middle of a burning room, congrats.

I know it may seem counterintuitive to celebrate your struggle, but hear me out:

You're at the crossroads of your destiny! Your life is expanding, and so are you. You are going through this new thing because it is the exact experience your Soul signed up for so that you could evolve into who you fully are.

And I love that for you!

Life might really be throwing you for a loop right now, but trust that you can handle it, and trust that it is for your highest good.

Recently I've been feeling constantly on the edge of a breakdown or a breakthrough.

In the moments when I notice myself being in resistance to what is happening in my life, I breathe and say to the Universe:

I'm open.
I'm open to learning whatever life is teaching me right now.
I'm curious about what this experience might be showing me.
I'm willing to let this moment grow me.

During new and uncomfortable experiences, I remind myself:

I don't have to be an expert at something I've never done before. I'm allowed to be a beginner. I am allowed to learn as I go.
This might not be easy, but there are ways to find ease in it.
Breathe. Drink water. Eat. (Repeat)

I've been through a lot of major life changes.

I have taken notes along the way to be able to help those who come after me. My first podcast episode was all about transitions, and being in the in-between spaces that life throws our way.

In the two years since I recorded that episode, I've expanded my toolkit of strategies that I use to carry myself through the flames:

Here are 5 things you can do to navigate new & challenging life experiences:

1. Be really, really kind to yourself. Self-compassion means treating and responding to yourself the way you would a loved one who was sad or struggling. Instead of ignoring or downplaying your pain, stop and tell yourself, “This is really difficult right now. How can I comfort and care for myself in this moment?" Release the impulse to "power through," or "be strong." Get enough sleep, feed your body nutritious foods, drink lots of water, and take things off your plate. You have enough to carry; give yourself permission to put the heavy things down.

2. Surround yourself with comfort and familiarity. Listen to the music you loved as a kid. Wear your favorite sweater. Travel with a blanket from your house. Eat a comfort meal. Comfort and familiarity allow us to take a sensory break from processing new experiences. This is the time to really lean into things that aren't new, to buffer the intensity of all the changes happening.

3. Do something the same way, every day. Daily practices provide structure, stability, and reassurance, which serve as emotional and mental anchors in the midst of change. Routines help us feel safer because we know what to expect. Creating predictable scenarios through habits allows your mind to adjust, understand what to expect, and alleviate anxiety over the unknown.

4. Prioritize relaxation. Fill your days with soothing activities like hot baths, self-massage, listening to calming music, and moving your body. Consider journeying with calming and/or mood-boosting plant allies (ie: lavender, chamomile, lemon balm) to support emotional balance. New experiences can be disorienting and disruptive to our nervous systems. Centering ease helps our bodies return to balance as quickly as possible.

5. Ask for help. I promise you there is somebody, somewhere who has gone through something similar to what you're going through, or who can (at least) relate. There's no need to navigate life alone. Community and resources are abundant. Speak with a trusted elder and get their insight. Join a forum and ask for advice. Tag a friend in to hold space for you. You are worthy and deserving of support. Let yourself have it.

for the days it feels like life is slowly going up in flames

Here are 5 things you can do to navigate new & challenging life experiences: